long post without pictures...did jen write this?

i'm writing from my bed this morning which is an excellent feeling but one that also makes me feel like Carrie Bradshaw {and i'm not sure how i feel about that}. i definitely have her giant hair kicking.

yesterday i mentioned that i wanted to share some of the things that i feel like the lord is either showing to me or helping me process, so here goes.

i was reading romans 11-12 yesterday in preparation for this week's little girl study an am just blown away by god's grace. the fact that he allows us & invites to be "grafted in" is SO amazing. that he desires to graft us in where we had never belonged {and still aren't worthy to be} so that we can have abundant life connected to him? wow! what a merciful god we have.

i also read chapter two of "crazy love". it ties in so well to these chapters in romans. he raises the idea that we really center our entire lives around ourselves, what we're doing, how we're going to get what we want etc. when in reality our lives now {and everything past & future} are about god, glorifying him & lifting him up. our perspective is so skewed that we think that in the movie of existence we see ourselves having a starring role when in all actuality we are an extra in a crowd of thousands {or billions}, on screen for a mere moment. its stated in romans 12:3 like this: "for by the grace given to me i say to every one of you: do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgement, in accordance with the measure of faith god has given you." that's what is important about us...nothing else that you do, but the faith you have in the lord.

come to think of it...everything that i've been reading is basically about being radically different than the culture for the sake of knowing christ more. francis chan is basically saying, get over yourself {i actually think that's a quote}, get over yourself & give your life away. roman's is saying "don't conform to the patterns of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." be different. and finally, acts....

i also read acts 1-5 and it was awesome. it is an account of the meetings and growing of the first ever church...like the body of believers, not the first time they built a building with a steeple. they were so radically counter-culture. there were a ton of things that stood out to me but for the sake of your time i'll try and keep it slim.

jesus had recently been crucified, resurrected & then been taken up BUT then sent his spirit to these new believers. one historical account tells of a beggar putting himself before peter {asking for money}, and peter responded: "silver or gold i do not have, but what i have i give you. in the name of jesus christ of nazareth, walk." AND HE DID! i thought, if i was in that position today would i have enough faith to say that out loud to someone? would i be able to believe in god enough to say healing words like that in front of others and KNOW that god would honor that request? i desperately want to have faith like that.

acts also shows the daily life of the first church: "they devoted themselves to the apostles teaching and to the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and prayer. everyone was filled with awe, and many wonders and miraculous signs were done by the apostles. all the believers were together & had everything in common. selling their possessions and goods they gave to anyone as he had need. everyday they continued to meet together in the temple courts. they broke bread in their homes and ate together with glad and sincere hearts, praising god and enjoying the favor of all the people. and the lord added to their number daily those who were being saved. "

wow! what a community! while i feel like i am REALLY blessed with an awesome community of people who encourage me and spur me on daily and do notice that we lack what is happening here in acts {and this is a much more personal conviction that i feel, than a conviction for those around me}. it isn't often that i see all of us selling all that we have to make sure that anyone who has a need in lexington gets it met. we all think that we need to save up more to get by in these "tough economic times" when we have plenty ourselves and have more than enough to give. it isn't often that we are consistently & constantly meeting together. we have to schedule around work and trips and appointments which causes us to miss out on some really awesome opportunities for fellowship and for growing. it isn't that often that "the lord is adding to our numbers daily." thousands were flocking to be a part of a community like this who's lives were actually centered solely on the lord. we were designed to be drawn to that.

it would be easy for us to think, "we just live in a different time...we can't expect to live like that first church" but i don't think that's true. i think we can live like the first church of acts, we just have to be radically different for the cause of knowing christ more. i'm going to try.