Tuesday, December 29, 2009

bronze god

that post title makes   me chuckle because in high school ben once went on a cruise for spring break with his fam, got burnt like alobster...{the terrible hurting sunburn that later peels like crazy} but by the time he returned to school he was the darkest shade of tan ever. our quasi-gay teacher called him a "bronze god" -- hysterical.

so on to the real reason for the post...

something horrific is happening. i am fading into see-through pale. i think this began sometime in october, it's now december. imagine what i'm going to be like when march rolls around? shreeeeekkkkk! ugh. i love being tan. i know that it is superficial and silly, i know that it has no eternal significance or weight and yet...i wish i could be tan so badly. maybe you are thinking... "jen, ever heard of a tanning bed?" my response: "why yes but i have put a ban on fake-n-bakin' for the past 3 years or so." DANG IT!

through my high school years & up into college i was an avid tanning bed attendant. i was never one of those jamacians in the middle of winter {i don't think} but i always had some color. my skin never looked see-through purple because ew...who wants purple skin. i know what my mom would say, "many people with fair skin are very beautiful." agreed, there are beautiful pale people out there but i am NOT one of them. i feel about 1,000 times better once i get some color on me!

since the ban continues i'm going to dream of being here...

sit me down right about here...

& let me soak up some of this! bring it on clear blue sky & warm sunny sun..

i am currently in the process of figuring out how to end my dilema & i think there is only one solution and it certainly isn't immediate.  i'm going to go on spring break with benny.  it's the only way to kill this digusting paleness that is taking over my body.  if you've got any suggestions on where we should for spring break on a budget that would be fantastic.

does anyone else feel my pale pain?  if you naturally have a dark complexion, don't respond.


  1. i feel your pale pain...but sorry i have no ban on tanning beds. so this pale body is gonna go starting next week because i can't take it anymore.

  2. I'm not purple. I'm gray. =(

  3. You young beautiful girls with your gorgeous freckles and wrinkle-less young skin...I turned 40 this year and let me tell you...all your tans will come back to haunt you! Coat that sun screen on and just get a tiny bit of color. The tan isn't worth the wrinkles! (I will stop sounding like your mom now!)

  4. I feel your pain girly!! If you find a solution that doesn't result in lots of wrinkles and possible skin cancer please fill me in ;D

  5. This post is hilarious, Jen! I totally hear you...only, I am incapable of getting a tan (talk about ew!) Pasty white pretty much sums me up. Anyhoo, thanks for the giggles and sunny-sun-sun fun images, and I LOVE your new layout. Happy New Year!!

  6. Oh yes to love of feeling tan. Since being married I have 'banned' those tanning beds too. Hubby's preference (aka, he doesn't enjoy me paying to get skin cancer and wrinkles) and it will benefit me when I'm 50 I'm sure. I have yet to try tanning lotions, the ones that tint your skin (how healthy can those be though, you are tinting your skin?) but that might be an option worth looking into. I just use a light brightener/bronzer with my makeup (Bare Minerals) and it helps the blah winter paleness. But oh to have a tan. . .


i am thrilled to see your comments. please give me some more to be thrilled about...